ILo's Language Blog

Broke, fool!

2012-01-27T15:44:00.001-06:00

We got new copiers in the office a few months ago and they are absolutely terrible. The copier we had before was kind of loud, but our new one has paper jams way too often. This morning, my coworker created a paper jam so the copier is out of commission until Monday when a technician can come out and fix it. In the meantime, someone posted a sign.

"The copier doesn't have any more money!" my boss said gleefully when she first saw it. I wanted to draw dollar bills on the sign, but we decided against it.

Broke can be a verb (past tense of break:) or an adjective (penniless!). Broken is only used as an adjective. Whoever wrote the sign obviously meant that the copier wasn't working anymore, but should have used an adjective to describe that we couldn't use it.

I do quite like this definition from UrbanDictionary.com:

7.	broke	10 up, 2 down
	Broke is what something becomes when it stops working. The same is true of people. If you are not working, you will soon be broke. I can't buy a new house, because I'm no longer working and am as a result, broke. buy broke mugs & shirts unemployed poor bankrupt peasant rich by qrios Aug 9, 2009 share this add a video

On a floor full of editors, writers, and grammar nerds, whoever wrote this sign should have known better.

Do you like links?

2011-11-14T11:55:00.001-06:00

I hope you like links. Here's roundup (yeeehaw):

A Word, Please: Pronouns explained in plain English - Thoroughly confusing but very interesting. I learned that “Whom shall I say is calling?” should actually still be “Who shall I say is calling?”

50 years ago in advertising: Merriam-Webster - "It's a wonderful gift at any age -- to write correctly, speak effectively, and read with understanding."

55 Synonyms for “Criticize” - I'm sure you'll find this list helpful.

Umbrella-ella-ella-ella

2011-10-20T20:44:00.000-05:00

It's been a rainy week here in Chicago. I have 3 umbrellas right now and 2 of them are broken. I bought one of them on Tuesday and by yesterday, it was already broken. The 2 broken umbrellas have lifetime warranties, but it costs more time and money to take them to the post office. The bottom line is that Chicago weather renders umbrellas useless. The bottom bottom line is that I should just wear a poncho.

So, I saw this tweet from Merriam-Webster recently. I love the word bumbershoot! It's so cute. According to MW, bumber is an alteration of umbr (umbrella) and shoot is an alteration of chute (parachute).

Don't like bumbershoot? Try brolly.

Conditional Statements

2011-09-30T11:44:00.000-05:00

In my last post, I wrote about restrictive and nonrestrictive clauses. The lyric I used as an example also happens to hold a nice little lesson about conditional statements.Conditional statements are made up of 2 clauses: condition and consequence. Usually, the condition is the subordinate clause and the consequence is the main clause.A comma should also separate these 2 clauses.

If I could find in all this a dozen roses [condition/subordinate clause], which I would give to you, [nonrestrictive clause] you'd still be miserable [consequence/main clause].

Notice that the condition is launched by if. The condition can also start off with when or whenever.

When I sleep late [condition/subordinate clause], I wake up late [consequence/main clause].

Here are some examples of well known conditional statements:

If you give a moose a muffin [condition/subordinate clause], he'll want some jam to go with it [consequence/main clause].

If you give a mouse a cookie [condition/subordinate clause], he's going to ask for a glass of milk [consequence/main clause].

If you give a pig a pancake [condition/subordinate clause], she'll want some syrup to go with it [consequence/main clause].

A last example is from "If I Die Young" by The Band Perry. Some people think it's weird and morbid, but it's such a beautiful song.

If I die young, bury me in satin
Lay me down on a, bed of roses
Sink me in the river, at dawn
Send me away with the words of a love song

Which vs That

2011-09-21T19:37:00.000-05:00

Hello boys and girls. Today's post centers around the song "Hate on Me" by Jill Scott. Watch this video and pay attention to the opening lyrics.

If I could give you the world
On a silver platter
Would it even matter
You'd still be mad at me
If I could find in all this
A dozen roses
Which I would give to you
You'd still be miserable

I know the question weighing on all your minds is, "wait, did she really use which?" Yes, she DID. Is that a problem? Well, let's see...

Which and that have been confusing English speakers, including myself, for ages. They are not interchangeable and, in fact, they serve as very different cues.

Which is used to begin a nonrestrictive clause. That means you can take out whatever comes after which. The nonrestrictive clause should also be sandwiched by commas.

I stopped by More Cupcakes, which is one of my favorite cupcake shops, today after work.

Notice that the nonrestrictive clause is in boldface and that it is also set off by commas (commas = frenemy). Does this sentence still make sense without the bold text? Is it extra information?

I stopped by More Cupcakes~~, which is one of my favorite cupcake shops,~~ today after work.

Yes, the sentence still makes sense. So remember, use which before a nonrestrictive clause and set it off by commas.

On the other hand, that leads into a restrictive clause and you do not need to use commas. Here comes another example about cupcakes...and grammar.

Red velvet cupcakes that are topped with cream cheese frosting are the tastiest!

See, there are no commas around that and the subsequent restrictive clause. If you took out the bold text above, the sentence still makes sense, but it now has a different meaning.

Red velvet cupcakes ~~that are topped with cream cheese frosting~~ are the tastiest!

I want to emphasize that the cream cheese frosting is what makes these red velvet cupcakes the tastiest. Without the restrictive clause "Red velvet cupcakes are the tastiest!" is still true (at least to me), but it doesn't hold the same weight anymore.

Just remember:
..., which (nonrestrictive clause---the sentence still makes sense without this), ...
... that (restrictive clause---the sentence's meaning changes without this) ...

So Jill Scott's lyrics are grammatically incorrect. The lyrics should read, "If I could find in all this/ A dozen roses/ That I would give to you/ You'd still be miserable."

Still confused? Try to take out "which I would give to you" and see if the lyrics still make sense.

If I could find in all this a dozen roses~~, which I would give to you,~~ you'd still be miserable.

Doesn't make sense, does it? What does finding roses have to do with your misery? Nothing. And that's why the lyric is actually a restrictive clause and should be lead off by that.

If I could find in all this a dozen roses that I would give to you, you'd still be miserable

Much better. By the way, you may be confused that there is a comma after our restrictive clause, which does not need to be set off by commas. It wasn't invited by that. It was invited by If, which makes this a conditional statement. We'll save that for another time.

Woop woop! Another grammar mystery solved.

Dum-dum-dum-Dumpster

2011-09-15T22:02:00.000-05:00

First off, I apologize for my leave of absence. Let's call it an unplanned summer break. :P I'm going to try to post more regularly again.

Let's get down to business...It's business time.

Some gargoyles in a trash receptacle.
NYC, summer 2008. Good times.

At one time or another, we've all said "Kleenex" when we mean "tissue," "Tylenol" when we mean "acetaminophen," and "Chapstick" for "lip balm." Kleenex, Tylenol, and Chapstick are all trade names or business names. These words are trademarked but are widely accepted over the generic term.

Add another one to your list: Dumpster. That's right, with a capital D. Why is that? Because "Dumpster" is actually the trade name for "waste
receptacle," "trash bin," or maybe even "rubbish container."

Maybe not the last one.

I doubt that people would rather say "I'm going to take this trash out to the waste receptacle," but this is good to know all the same especially in professional writing or to impress your friends at your high school reunion.

Here's proof that Dumpster as a trade name isn't just nerd-information. In a Simpsons episode titled "The Otto Show," the show's writers acknowledge this trade name.

Bart: Otto-Man? You're living in a dumpster?
Otto: Ho, man, I wish. Dumpster-brand trash bins are top-of-the-line.
This is just a Trash-Co waste disposal unit.
-- His summer home is the aluminum recycle bin down the street,

And now you know.

Why would you want to get to the bush?

2011-05-13T13:39:00.000-05:00

I: o_O
that's weird, man.
C: no kidding
he likes to beat around the bush...and then run around it...and then skip around it....point is..he never gets to the bush. hahah
come to think of it, that is SUCH a weird saying
hahah
why would you want to get to the bush?

Good question, C! First of all, if someone beats around the bush, it means that he or she is avoiding a question or topic and not getting straight to the point. So where did this phrase come from? The consensus is that hunters used to beat tree branches so that the game would escape and it would be easier for hunters to catch them. It was an indirect hunting technique to get to the game without having to attack them point blank. You can read more about the origins of this phrase here.

So, C, to answer your question, you would want to get to the bush because that's where your dinner is. The main difference is that when hunters did this, they wanted to get the game in the tree. It was one more step for them to reach their goal. When we use this technique today, we often want to avoid the main point. We offer a million answers before we admit to the truth. It's a bunch of steps we take to avoid reaching the goal. I wonder how it happened. Is this human evolution? Our predecessors beat around the bush to survive physically, to feed themselves. Today, we do it to survive too, but in a social way. Sometimes we do it to save face.

Oh, but the idea of saving face is something I'll explore in my next post. Coming soon: the etymology of "heck" and why it's more acceptable than "hell" and "fuck."

Wisdom Teeth

2011-04-07T23:23:00.000-05:00

At the end of February, I got all four wisdom teeth removed. I was supposed to get them out in early college but it had taken years for me to actually get myself to the dentist. I regret the procrastination, but there were other factors at play.

In general, I speak to my parents in Chinglish. I'll speak in Chinese if I'm feeling patient or in English if I'm feeling passionate or emotional. My mom responds to me in Mandarin and my dad responds in English (go figure). So when I was talking to my parents about my wisdom teeth, my mom said the phrase in Mandarin. When I asked what the literal translation was, she said simply, "wisdom teeth."

Why are wisdom teeth called wisdom teeth? Well, these third molars typically grow in between 17 and 25. This is supposedly the age where we graduate from childhood to adulthood and gain more wisdom. This phrase comes from Greek and first appeared in 1668. Hippocrates called them "sophronisteres," from "sophron" which translates to prudent. Hop on over to Rome, where they called them "dentes sapientiae" which means teeth of wisdom. Whether or not we become wiser between the ages of 17 to 25 is still a question mark to me.

Similar translations of "wisdom teeth" are used in many other languages such as Hebrew, Arabic, Turkish, Italian, Portuguese, Spanish, and French. It's interesting that humans were so inclined to give these teeth a name instead of just calling them our third molars.

In Korean, though, wisdom teeth is actually 사랑니, or love teeth. The assumption is that this is the age when people experience the pain of a first love. What a poignant observation and timely lesson.

As a sidebar, there do seem to be many similarities between the extraction of wisdom teeth and the loss of a first love, or any love for that matter. That, of course, is a story for another time.

Pi Day

2011-03-14T18:04:00.000-05:00

Today is Pi Day, the best day of the year. Pi is most commonly known as 3.14, which translates to 3/14 or March 14. I am not a fan of geometry, but I love pie and then also pi by association. Pi (π) is the ratio of a circle's circumference to the diameter, or 3.14159265. So if I do not care about pi, why do I love pie so much?

Pi and pie are homophones! Homophones are words that sound alike but have different meanings. Some other examples include:
-flower and flour (although, if you ask my friend Hana, she does not pronounce them the same.)
-two, to, and too
-pale and pail (I used to think that pale people meant people who looked like pails. It was very confusing to watch Pocahontas.)

Not everyone pronounces words the same, as I mentioned about my friend Hana and flower and flour. She actually pronounces flour as "flar." When I was in college, I took a class on linguistics. Our professor was from the South and we discussed pronouncing marry, merry, and Mary. When I say these words, they sound the same to me. People with southern accents may pronounce them differently so they have no trouble telling them apart, unlike us from northern states. Other homophones that dialect-dependent are aunt and ant, stock and stalk, and caught and colt.

If the term 'dialect-dependent' confuses you, think about the song Do-Re-Mi from The Sound of Music. When Maria and the Von Trapp children sing, "fa: a long long way to run" did you get confused? I sure did when I was a kid. To Americans, we would enunciate the R in far, but for Maria and the children, they would pronounce far without the R. This is a dialect-dependent word.

Anyway, enough about homophones. If you haven't eaten any pie yet today, go eat some. Happy Pi Day!

Walgreens' Perfect World

2011-02-23T09:20:00.000-06:00

I'm sure you've seen those commercials for Walgreens. They boast: "We don't live in a perfect world, but that doesn't mean we shouldn't try." I guess they don't consider proper signs anything to try for. Here are some gems from my neighborhood Walgreens:

Lunchmeat=beer

Crakers! Mmmm...

Proved vs. Proven

2010-12-20T22:06:00.000-06:00

In this blog post, let's explore the difference between the words proven and proved.

The -ed ending usually signifies past tense for regular verbs: walked, watched, waited. Likewise, the -ed ending in proved lets us know that it is a verb.

Ex: She proves that she can recite the lyrics to every Weird Al song.
She proved that she could recite the lyrics.

So we know that proved is a verb. What is proven? This is where it gets tricky. Proven is accepted as a past participle (like proved) in certain situations but is also typically used as an adjective.

Ex: That is the proven truth. (adjective)
She was proven wrong. (verb)

As stated above, proven is not always considered a past participle. It seems that many professional writers only use proven as an adjective. I'm flipping through my Strunk and White to see what they have to say on the topic, but I'm having trouble. I'll also look through my AMA Manual of Style tomorrow too.

What's your preference? Do you use proven as a past participle or only as an adjective?

Dissatisfied vs. Unsatisfied

2010-10-17T18:28:00.001-05:00

When I was in college, I had my cousin look over a story I had to turn in for a class. He, being some sort of grammar guru, took one look at it and pulled out a bunch of grammatical mistakes. One of them was whether I had meant to use dissatisfied or unsatisfied. I had no idea that there was even a difference (for the record, I have always maintained that I was a terrible English student)! Shall we explore?

Dissatisfied: Deprived of satisfaction; displeased; disquieted by the feeling of the insufficiency or inadequacy of something.

Unsatisfied: Not satisfied in respect of something desired; not having obtained all that, or as much as, is wished for.

In laymen's terms? To be dissatisfied, you would be displeased, unhappy, or upset with a person, thing, or situation. To be unsatisfied, you would feel like you want more with something usually abstract. For example, if I go to a restaurant, I can be dissatisfied with the service. Maybe the waiter never refilled my beverage, or perhaps refilled it too often (oh, I'm terribly picky with service). I could also be dissatisfied with the food. Let's say the tofu went bad and it was sour. That would warrant being dissatisfied or displeased with my meal. Now in the same context, I could also be unsatisfied. Maybe there were only three pieces of tofu in my noodle soup and I was hoping for at least five pieces. Tofu isn't abstract, but you get the picture. I wanted more but couldn't have it.

I know it's kind of confusing--it certainly is to me still. Something that can help is when you see either word in text, just pause and think about how the author used it and try to understand the meaning.

No, That's MY Rooster

2010-10-04T10:28:00.000-05:00

A few weeks ago, a friend texted me the photo below of The Good Egg People box.

Suit Case's [rooster]

Upon seeing the apostrophe, I started looking for the possessive object and came to the conclusion that the suit case possesses the rooster. Obviously, the rooster belongs to the suit case. I mean, what else could it be? Well...I suppose someone could have used this box, formerly holding eggs, to store suitcases (or suit case's) and marked it accordingly. I suppose it's possible...

For Effen Fun

2010-09-29T02:07:00.000-05:00

This sign isn't up anymore (too bad), but it used to be posted on a liquor store in Boyfriend's neighborhood.

Effen Vodka

It does exist!

Also see: Effingham, Illinois

A Case of the No's

2010-09-18T19:44:00.000-05:00

This post is kind of an echo of Panhandler, please! (remember the sign maker's adamant NO!...panhandler please). Anyway, here we go, here we go.

I'm about a twenty minute walk from work. Although I never walk to work in the morning, I usually try to walk home in the afternoon. It's nice to walk past the Lamborghini dealership and wonder about the women who shop at Barney's and Hermes. On the block of my apartment building, I noticed this sign on a door:

No!!!! Smoking On the Patio

Aaaaand an imaginary conversation floats into my mind...

"Are you in your mom's basement playing video games?"
"No!!!! I'm smoking on the patio."

Okay, I know that was a really lame conversation. I'm just trying to wrap my mind around what the sign maker was thinking. Did he or she, like the panhandler's sign maker, really think it was appropriate to emphasize no with four exclamation points? (Oh, sidebar: my boss thinks we should only use one exclamation point a year. Another post at another time, I promise). I guess this sign isn't as official as the panhandler sign, though, because someone just typed it and printed it from a computer.

Hey, how about this imaginary situation:

I am walking on the street and see a woman taking a smoke break outside. "No!!!!" I wildly exclaim. "Smoking on the patio--that's terrible!"

Equally lame, I know. In any case, I think I've established what a ridiculous sign that is.

Nooooooo!!!!!!!!!

A Repost from Personal Blog--7/24/08

2010-08-24T10:18:00.001-05:00

Nigger's out (a sign seen in New York, under which was written, wickedly: "But he'll be back shortly").

Works Cited:
1. Truss, Lynn. Eats, Shoots & Leaves. New York, New York: Gotham Books, 2006. 51.

AMA Style Tip of the Day

2010-07-01T15:48:00.000-05:00

According to the AMA Manual of Style (10th ed):

When writing citations, if there are six or less authors, list them all.
When there are more than six authors, list the first three authors followed by "et al."

My Bad

2010-06-23T11:43:00.000-05:00

I have not posted in a few weeks - I know. I promise I'll be back shortly.

Please!! Toilet Etiquette

2010-06-06T19:12:00.000-05:00

As I mentioned in my last post, I recently started a new job. I have been waiting a long time for this post, as I knew I could only publish it on this blog after I ended my last job.

This particular gem was found in the ladies' bathroom:

ATTENTION!! PLEASE! While modern technology is great, it does not always work. Please be considerate of others and make sure the toilet flushes. If not,push the button located on the front of the censor. PLEASE!

I'd like to talk about being concise. There are a lot of unnecessary elements in this sign. For example, the fact that this is a sign means that we don't really need the "ATTENTION!! PLEASE!" I guess "ATTENTION!!" (minus the double exclamation point) is okay, but do they really need to be so polite about it? In addition, I would get rid of the first complete sentence. It's like when kids write this in their papers: "since the beginning of time, women have always been inferior to men." This is simply a filler. In the second full sentence, the sign-maker writes "please," hence making the first capitalized one unnecessary as well. My problem with the third full sentence is the lack of space after the comma and also the spelling of "censor." To censor something is to delete something (verb) or it can also mean someone who is a critic of sorts (noun). What the sign-maker was looking for is the word "sensor," a mechanical device that is sensitive to light, touch, or temperature and transmits a signal.

And, of course, one last "PLEASE!" You can tell the sign-maker was getting really desperate.

I have to say though, I did not notice that many unflushed toilets while I was there...

Not So Great Sexpectations

2010-05-30T23:17:00.001-05:00

As some of you may know, I ended my job search of about six months a few weeks ago. Looking back, all of that went by so quickly but when I was actually living it, it caused much anxiety, insecurity, and hopelessness (oh, so dramatic, I know). In any case, I am thankful that I will be starting a new job this Tuesday. I know it will lead to many very exciting things.

Oh gosh, none of the above paragraph has anything to do with language. My bad.

Back to the point: during my job search, I looked at a lot of different positions - communications, publishing, and tutoring. For example, I stumbled upon this job ad one day...

Meet/exceed Learning Care Group. Inc. 'sexpectations by understanding, anticipating and meeting company's needs...

This is a simple typo, but it makes me think twice about applying to a job from this website and sure enough, I did not. Even if it is only a job ad, it represents the company or organization.

The sad thing is, the typo is still up.

Short post - happy Memorial Day!

Check all that apply: Mr., Mrs., Miss, or Miss

2010-05-16T22:19:00.000-05:00

This post is a request (yay!). Remember, if you have questions and/or want to know more about something, e-mail me at irislo@gmail.com.

When I was in first grade, my teacher's last name was "Bucher." I remember my mother not knowing how to pronounce it and my brother, Ivan, had to help her figure it out. Besides that, there was always the problem of how to address her. Was she a Ms., a Miss, or a Mrs.? And why was it always so much easier for men? They were all Mr. I guess it was also helpful that we only had one male teacher in the whole school.

Mr., Mrs., Miss, and Ms. are all title prefixes (e.g., Mr. Happy, Miss Sunshine). And if I were Ms. Frizzle, I would say, "seatbelts everyone!" as we shall now take an informative journey to learn about title prefixes, sponsored by Dictionary.com and the Oxford English Dictionary.

Though many believe that Mr. (plural: Messrs.) is an abbreviation for Mister, it actually originated in the 17th century from Master. However, it does now stand for mister. Mr. is used for men of all ages with no regard to marital status. My brothers and father can all be addressed as Mr. Lo though they are many years apart.

Mrs. (plural: Mesdames) is used for married women with no higher or professional titles (e.g., Dr.). It is sometimes used with the husband's full name. For example, mail might be addressed to Mrs. Homer J. Simpson and is meant for Marge. You would call my mother Mrs. Lo.

Miss (plural: Misses) is used for unmarried women. Similar to Mr., Miss has different origins than what we know it as now. According to OED, Miss first referred to "a kept woman, a mistress; a concubine. Also (occas.): a prostitute, a whore." It was not until the 19th century that Miss became a prefix for unmarried women. In modern time (note: I am not a kept woman, mistress, concubine, prostitute, or whore), I am addressed as Miss Lo.

Ms. (plural: Mses. or Mss.) is kind of like Switzerland. It's neutral and it does not take a side. Ms. is used when you do not know or do not wish to disclose a woman's marital status. I would say using Ms. is the most PC, if you go for that kind of thing. In the 1970s, using Ms. was encouraged by the women's movement. The rationale behind this was that Mr. did not signal a man's marital status, so why did feminine title prefixes? Both my mother and I can be called Ms. Lo.

And now you can take off your seatbelt and exit the bus.

Panhandler, please!

2010-05-02T15:54:00.000-05:00

Last week, after a long day of errands and shopping with boyfriend and one of my best friends, we went to Chinatown for dinner. We took the Red Line and got to see the new CTA cars! And I must say: once you see the new ones, you just can't go back to the old smelly cars.

Hong Kong-based Saint's Alp Teahouse always hits me with nostalgia of a place I've only been to rarely and when I was much younger. Sometimes our memories weigh far more than reality. With only three locations in the States (two in New York and one in our very own Chicago), we are lucky to have Saint's Alp here. After a coma-inducing meal, we wandered around Chinatown and I saw this sign:

No! Panhandler please

This sign has been posted in Chinatown for as long as I can remember. I always thought it was funny because I imagine that the sign's maker had a conversation with a panhandler. They didn't agree and the maker said to the panhandler, "No! Panhandler, please. You are wrong!"

This probably did not happen. The sign's maker probably just wanted to write, "No panhandlers please!" and misplaced our good friend, the exclamation mark.

Anyway, I don't have much to say except that I've always loved this sign and that it probably belongs on Engrish.com.

Every Each Day & Everyday Daily

2010-04-18T22:18:00.001-05:00

Earlier this month, I dropped by Starbucks for a morning pick-me-up (though sadly, it wore off before lunchtime.). While waiting for my java chip frappuccino (yes, I know it is a childish Starbucks order, haha.), I noticed this sign.

Your drink should be perfect, every time.
If not, let us know and we'll make it right.

I've always kind of had a terrible relationship with every__ and every __ (such as everyday and every day). In college, I had an instructor who freaked out whenever someone wrote every___. He would say with excessive passion, "it's every [pause] day. Every year, every month, every [pause] day." It is rather confusing, especially when dictionary.com yields zero results for the word "everytime," while Britney Spears has a 2004 song called "Everytime." Well, it's easy to assume who is right...

Anyway, let us examine the difference between everyday and every [pause] day (Yes, I will stop inserting "pause" all the time.). If you search for "every day" on dictionary.com, it will automatically show up as "everyday," though other sources will pointedly declare that there is a difference.

You see, everyday is an adjective that is used to describe a normal occurrence and is synonymous with daily: Writing in my journal is part of my everyday routine (Writing in my journal is part of my daily routine). On the other hand, every day can be replaced by each day: I write in my journal every day (I write in my journal each day).

On a slightly odd note, the song Everyday from High School Musical 2 comes to mind. Please blame this on my childish tendencies to enjoy Disney specials. Here are some lyrics:

Everyday of our lives,
wanna find you there, wanna hold on tight

So did the writers use the correct word/phrase? If everyday is indeed grammatically correct, it will make sense to replace it with daily and if every day is what we want, then we'll be able to replace it with each day.

Daily of our lives,
wanna find you there, wanna hold on tight

vs.

Each day of our lives,
wanna find you there, wanna hold on tight

Clearly, the High School Musical 2 lyrics is incorrect and should be every day instead.

Ohh, this post not only brings to surface a Britney Spears lyric failure, but also a Disney failure. Most excellent.

Busted Blockbuster

2010-04-11T20:03:00.000-05:00

There's a Blockbuster that's closing down on Milwaukee and Wabansia. They are selling a bunch of movies, though I do not know why they don't just send them to another Blockbuster.

One sign in particular caught my attention:

All previously viewed DVD's $9.99 ea. or less!

We have already covered some of the inconsistencies of the English apostrophe and here is yet another one.

When I first saw the sign, I was immediately revolted by the apostrophe -s after DVD and thought to myself: the DVD does not own $9.99 each! Wouldn't an apostrophe -s signify ownership? Silly Blockbuster! So here I was, ready to write this post and thinking, I got this! (George Lopez style - 0:56 mark).

I guess now is a good time to emphasize that I research everything I post on this blog. I never just start writing without reading up on the topic first. I hold an English degree, yes, but I am also a student of research, always looking to a couple of different sources before I commit words to cyberspace.

So after reading about apostrophe -s and plural nouns, DVD's is actually not incorrect, depending on writing style. There is an exception for apostrophe -s when it comes to plural acronyms (e.g., why aren't there any surcharge-free ATM's around here?). My personal writing style is to only add an apostrophe -s to clear ambiguity. For example, I might want to write something like, "there sure are a lot of I's, S's, and P's in Mississippi!" In that case, I wouldn't write, "Is, Ss, and Ps" because there are different connotations with that (the third person conjugation of the verb "to be"; snakessss' postscript).

The bottom line: the Blockbuster signs are perfectly fine, but are not my personal taste.

It's a Made Up Word

2010-04-04T17:43:00.000-05:00

TBS will not allow me to embed this video, so please click here to watch this first. It is a clip from season four, episode seven of The Office.

Ryan: What I really want, honestly, Michael, is for you to know it so that you can communicate it to the people here, to your clients, whomever.
Michael: Oh okay.
Ryan: What?
Michael: It's whoever, not whomever.
Ryan: It's whomever.
Michael: No, whomever is never actually right.
Jim: Nope, sometimes it's right.
Creed: Michael is right. It's a made up word used to trick students-
Andy: No. Actually, whomever is the formal version of the word--
Oscar: Obviously it's a real word- but I don't know how to use it correctly.
Michael Scott: [to camera] Not a native speaker.
Kevin: I know what's right. But I'm not gonna say. Because you're all jerks who didn't come see my band last night.
Ryan: Do you really know which one is correct?
Kevin: I don't know.
Pam: It's whom when it's the object of the sentence and who when as the subject.
Phyllis: That sounds right.
Michael: Well it sounds right but is it?
Stanley: How did Ryan use it, as an object?
Ryan: As an object.
Kelly: Ryan used me as an object.
Oscar: Is he right about that--
Pam: How did he use it again?
Toby: It was, Ryan wanted Michael, the subject, to explain the computer system, the object--
Michael: Thank you!
Toby: ...to whomever, meaning us, the indirect object. Which is the, the correct usage of the word.
Michael: No one, uh asked you anything ever so whomever's name is Toby, why don't you take a letter opener and stick it in your skull?

Pam and Toby are right. Whomever is the object while whoever is the subject. Likewise, whom is the object and who is the subject.

When you're not sure when to use who and whom, try to replace it with another subject or object. For example, I think many people, including myself, would automatically just say, "who are you looking for?" However, this is grammatically incorrect. Let's dissect the sentence.

Subject: you
Verb: are looking
Preposition: for
Object: who

Knowing what we know now, the sentence should actually be, "whom are you looking for" because whom is the object of the sentence. Let's also check that whom is the object by replacing it with an object that we may be a bit more familiar with such as him. To avoid sounding like Yoda, we will rearrange the sentence (instead of saying, "him are you looking for?"): Are you looking for him? To native English speakers, this will sound a lot more natural than saying Are you looking for he? (incorrect) because he and who are subjects and him and whom are objects.

Since we usually just use who even when whom is correct, I'll give a quick example of how to properly use who: Who is coming to dinner? In this case, try replacing who, the subject, with another subject such as he: He is coming to dinner?

Gaga Grammar

2010-03-28T17:27:00.000-05:00

While there is no doubt that Lady Gaga is a musical genius (brilliant, but crazy), she might consider picking up some grammar tips. Take, for example, this song Bad Romance co-written by Lady Gaga and RedOne

"You and me could write a bad romance."
(By the way, this video is not appropriate for children, or probably for anyone. At least it is not as creepy as the Telephone music video)

So the problem I have here is that Lady Gaga sings, "you and me" when it should really be, "you and I." English speakers often confuse when to use me versus I in this situation. Here's an easy trick: replace the whole phrase with either me or I.

For example, which of these sounds right to you:

Me could write a bad romance.

I could write a bad romance.

I hope you chose the second one. If not, let's talk (haha - no seriously, let's.). You see, I is a subject and usually is followed by a verb, while me is an object and is usually what the verb acts on (for example, "a bad romance" is the object in Gaga's lyric).

An example where you could say you and me is when it is used as an object: They could write a bad romance about you and me.

It's pretty simple once you replace the you and I and you and mewith either I or me respectively. Remember that I is a subject and that me is an object and think about where that would go in a sentence. There you go, Gaga. You and I could write grammatically correct lyrics together.

...

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The Dash Don't be Silent

2010-03-21T21:51:00.000-05:00

A month or two ago, my co-worker waved me over to her desk. She scribbled something down on a post-it note and asked me how I would pronounce it.

"La...a...?" I said uncertainly.

She laughed. The post-it note read, "La-a." My co-worker said she had heard two firsthand accounts of someone who met women named La-a.

My reaction: "...meh??"

But sure enough, the name exists (though some claim it is some sort of racist urban legend.) La-a comes from the name Ladasha or Ledasha, although I am not sure why or when people started using a dash.

urbandictionary.com

facebook.com
The dash don't be silent! ...HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA.

When pronouncing the name, you actually say "dash," which does not follow regular English rules. In fact, abiding by these crazy daisy rules, the name should be pronounced as, "la·hyphen·a." You see, hyphens commonly form compound words (e.g., the legal drinking age in American is twenty-one), while dashes usually connect digits (e.g., the meeting is from 1:30-2:30 p.m.) or other words (e.g., the Chicago-New York flight was delayed due to the snow), among other uses (perhaps I will explore this at another time).

Besides the grammatical inconsistency, it's just kind of a dumb name (NOTE: La-a is dumb, not Ladasha). What's next? La/a?? (LASLASHA!)

Its vs. It's

2010-03-14T22:22:00.000-05:00

This post is a request! Yay, my first. Remember, if you are curious, have questions, or see something funny/interesting about grammar or language, e-mail me at irislo@gmail.com and I'll write about it. And won't you feel special?

So its vs. it's. Use its to show possession (e.g., its colors are still bright after all these years.), while you use it's as a contraction of it and is (e.g., baby, it's cold outside).

Its is a pronoun and is the possessive form of it. If this is confusing because of the -s at the end, just think of its as a unit. Don't think of -s as a suffix because it's not. Its is in the same category of words as her and his. Next time you're writing and you're not sure whether to use its or it's, see if you can replace the word in question with her or his (e.g. his colors are still bright after all these words).

As I mentioned earlier, it's is a contraction of it and is, not to be confused with the possessive form because of -'s. If you can replace it's with it is, you're on the right track!

I can totally understand why people would get its and it's confused. Usually, you make a noun possessive by adding -'s, such as "Kimmy's ice cream cone fell on the sidewalk" or "Toby's toys are plentiful." However, there are always exceptions to the rule and this seems to be one of them. Just remember: its is a possessive and can be replaced by her or his while it's is a contraction despite -'s and can be replaced by it is.

Mark that Trade

2010-03-07T16:44:00.000-06:00

There's a diner on Canal and Roosevelt, White Palace Grill, that Favian always says is his counterpart to the Seinfeld diner. We've never been there, but there always seems to be a fair amount of people inside.

A few weeks ago, after catching a movie at the new Icon Theater (they offer froyo, whole pizzas, and tea!!!), we were waiting for the bus outside of White Palace Grill and I noticed the Coca-Cola sign.

Trade-mark?

The sign caught my eye because a hyphen was used. These days, people either write "trademark" or, to a lesser extent, "trade mark" (confirmed by dictionary.com).

According to the Oxford English Dictionary, trade-mark was first noted in a report of a 1838 court case. In 1862, the expression referred to any article of trade. As early as 1904, the hyphen was still used. Though I am unsure when trademark became unhyphenated, White Palace Grill did open in 1939, so the year we are looking for may be after that.

Hyphens usually connect two related words that are commonly understood together such as cross-country or multi-use. As language and society change, these words may drop the hyphen to become one word or may split back into two words. Trademark is an example of this. As we know from the OED, it was once hyphenated.

Some words like makeup or make-up are somewhat in the middle. I have always spelled it as one word, unhyphenated. However, a few years back, I asked my cousin, who has a background from Hong Kong and Canada, to look over a short story I had written for an undegrad course. He added a hyphen to my makeup. This particular example is attributed to personal writing style and is acceptable with or without the hyphen.

Now if only someone could tell me why Coca-Cola is hyphenated....

i.e. vs e.g.

2010-02-28T18:49:00.001-06:00

Oftentimes, I am not sure when to use i.e. and when to use e.g. so I typically avoid them. However, everything in life is a choice and since other people use them, let's figure out the correct usage and what they mean.

I.e. and e.g. are Latin abbreviations, usually encased in a set of parentheses and end with a comma. I.e. means id est, or that is, while e.g. means exempli gratia, or for the sake of example. I.e. adds clarity to your sentence while e.g. offers an example.

Let's see how we can use i.e. and e.g.:
Favian's dog (i.e., Daphne) likes to eat weird food (e.g., Brussels sprouts and peanut butter).

If you'd like to avoid using i.e. and e.g. altogether, try this instead:
Favian's dog, Daphne, likes to eat weird food such as Brussels sprouts and peanut butter.

More examples!!!
I tried the weirdest citrus fruit (i.e., kumquat) last week at work.
I have an addiction to citrus fruits (e.g., pomelos, clementines, and key limes).

Bubba Bubba Deedle Deedle Dum

2010-02-17T00:33:00.000-06:00

I took four and a half years of French and I learned more about French grammar than English grammar. Up until high school French class, I knew nothing about the subjunctive.

In the song Rich Girl by Gwen Stefani, the subjunctive is not used. However, Rich Girl samples a song called, If I Were a Rich Man from the musical, Fiddler on the Roof. The latter song actually does use the subjunctive. Perhaps Gwen Stefani was just trying to be...cool.

Rich Girl by Gwen Stefani featuring Eve.

If I was a rich girl
See, I'd have all the money in the world, if I was a wealthy girl
No man could test me, impress me, my cash flow would never ever end
Cause I'd have all the money in the world, if I was a wealthy girl

If I were a Rich Man from the musical, Fiddler on the Roof

If I were a rich man,
Ya ha deedle deedle, bubba bubba deedle deedle dum.
All day long I'd biddy biddy bum.
If I were a wealthy man.
I wouldn't have to work hard.
Ya ha deedle deedle, bubba bubba deedle deedle dum.
If I were a biddy biddy rich,
Yidle-diddle-didle-didle man.

Normally, when you conjugate the verb for first person, you would say, "I was." However, "if" signifies the subjunctive. To form the subjunctive, instead of conjugating a verb, just use the infinitive sans "to" (for example, to sleep, to wake, to eat). However, there is an exception with the past tense of to be, which is what we see in this example. When using the subjunctive with the verb to be, simply use the past tense plural form, were. If I were a rich girl, not was.

Other common subjunctive phrases include:

God damn it

truth be told

til death do us part

if I were you, I would use the subjunctive!

Use the subjunctive when:
1) expressing a wish (I wish I were tan)
2) a hypothesis (if I were tan, I would not be pale)
3) a purpose (I eat lest I die)
4) to express a doubt or supposition (murder, though it have no tongue, will speak).

Apostrophe Catastrophe

2010-02-14T14:27:00.000-06:00

First of all, Happy Valentine's Day! I hope you are all sharing the day with someone you love, whether it be with your family, a best friend, or a significant other.

Moving on...

I have to preface the rest of this post by saying that I am, in no way, making fun of the organization below, Sisters Breast Cancer Survivors Network. We all know and love someone who has been affected by breast cancer. Through this post, I merely want to explain the importance of consistency and proofreading, and also offer some information on how to use possessive apostrophes. So here we go.

(Click to enlarge.)

Earlier this week, I stumbled upon this website for the Sisters Breast Cancer Survivors Network. However, take a closer look at the banner at the top of the page, which reads: "Sisters's Breast Cancer Survivors Network." Notice that the word Sisters takes on a possessive apostrophe-S, though that is not what is represented in the text of the website. There is a lesson to be learned here about consistency.

I'd also like to bring up the importance of editing. I try to pay attention to detail, but of course I get distracted or have something else on my mind and I don't catch everything. As a result, not everything I post the first time is perfect. However, in this particular case, it seems that whoever maintains the website knows that he or she wants to write "Sisters" instead of "Sisters's." Because of that, there is really no reason for the banner to be inconsistent and grammatically incorrect.

Why, exactly, is "Sisters's" grammatically incorrect? We know that generally, to make a noun possessive, we add -'s. We also know that there is some sort of rule out there about not adding -'s if the noun ends with an s. I've always had this problem with my name. If, for example, I'm making an event for Facebook to take place at my apartment, do I write, "Iris' apartment" or "Iris's apartment"?

The rule is to add -'s to all singular nouns, even if they already end in S. So "Iris's apartment" would be correct because my name is a singular noun. This is actually something I learned in college. Up until then, I tried to avoid using my name as a possessive noun or I incorrectly wrote "Iris'".

Continuing on, if you were to talk about the brown hue of irises in my eyes, you would say, "the irises' brown hue" because irises would be a plural noun, therefore only needing an apostrophe and no S.

In an odd twist, when taking on the possessive form, ancient proper nouns such as Jesus, Moses, and Sophocles, only need an apostrophe, though they are singular names. You would write, "Jesus' love," "Moses' brother," and "Sophocles' plays."

For more information on possessive apostrophes, take a look at the Purdue OWL page, which I frequently refer to when I write these posts and also for daily use.

No See

2010-02-07T21:48:00.000-06:00

There's this memory that I've carried with me since I was a child. A friend of my dad's came over to our home. I don't remember who this person was or how old I was the time. All I remember is that when my dad greeted his friend, he said, "long time no see." As a child, I was terrified of being different from my peers (read: white American). To me, the phrase my dad uttered set him apart. You see, at the time, I had no idea it was an English idiom. I thought my dad was just using poor grammar. I guess I had expected him to say something like, "I haven't seen you in a long time!" instead.

Where does long time no see originate from? As it turns out, I had nothing to be embarrassed about since it actually stems from the Chinese phrase, "好耐沒見" (hao jiu mei jian). Literally translated, it is indeed very similar to the idiom: very long no see. The thing about the English language is that it's the language of colonization, of majority power, of conquer. Consequently, English is a mash-up of other languages. We borrow phrases and words from the others and adapt it to our own language.

UI-Scam

2010-01-30T22:53:00.001-06:00

I received the following e-mail a few weeks back from the IT guys at work. I'm a communications assistant at a state university in the Midwest. The e-mail deals with a scam that someone is sending around UIC trying to get people's e-mail IDs and passwords. Take a look at the forwarded e-mail: "Dear uic Customer...2009 Customer Service"

(Click image to enlarge.)

My first thought was how am I honestly supposed to believe that this is an official e-mail from UIC (Then again, it is UIC, but I try to give them more credit. Although the letter I got to confirm my graduation was obviously not proofread)? Let's count the mistakes:
1) In the greeting, uic should be capitalized as a proper noun.
2) Also in the greeting, why is the C in customer capitalized?
3) This, in the first sentence, is the first word in the sentence and should be capitalized.
4) Data base is usually one word: database.
5) ...to avoid your account been close. WHAT? I'm pretty sure the scammers were going for "being closed." Pretty sure.
6) You in the last sentence is not capitalized. This is a problem, I tell you.
7) Why is 24hrs all bunched up like that? It is possible that 24 and hrs are tired of being together all the time.
8) Copyright © 2009 Customer Service should probably be on its own line. It should also probably mention UIC somewhere in that copyright.

Are there more problems? You tell me.

The Jerriest

2010-01-23T12:22:00.001-06:00

Before you read the rest of this post, watch this clip from one of my favorite Seinfeld episodes, The Soup Nazi. Specifically, watch out for the 1:40 mark and listen to what Bania says. There's a nice French lesson too.

So now that you've seen the clip, take a look at this ad for New York City Bagel Deli that I found by 90/94 on North Avenue between Elston and Ashland.

My first critique is, of course, that this ad is in Chicago so why do we need a New York deli? After I get over that, I notice that there is a Seinfeld quote (noted above) that reads: "It's the best Jerry the best!"

This is when my confusion sets in, as it does so often: What is the best Jerry? Are there worse Jerries? What makes the Jerry so great?

NYC Bagel Deli could have cleared this up for me by writing instead, "It's the best, Jerry, the best!" With two simple comma inserts, I probably wouldn't have made fun of them for their New York style bagels in Chicago.

The skeleton of this particular sentence is, "It's the best." "Jerry" and "the best" are not essential to understanding this sentence. It adds detail and style, but it is unnecessary. A good rule of thumb that I use is if there are words or phrases that seem extra to the sentence, use a comma or two, depending on the location of said words or phrases.

Take this example: "Jessica's dog, Ellie, relieved her bladder on my carpet." The word "Ellie" is not essential to the sentence. It is not the subject (the subject is actually "dog"), nor the verb (relieved), nor the object (bladder). Therefore, "Ellie" is set off by commas, just as "Jerry" is.

Punctuation Not Acceptable

2010-01-17T22:47:00.000-06:00

Last Friday, I went to Lao Sze Chuan for dinner and Favian received this fortune cookie and I immediately felt assaulted as the English nerd that I am. Let's expand, shall we? This fortune consists of two sentences:

Sell your ideas = Transitive verb + determiner + direct object

they are totally acceptable = Subject + be verb + determiner + adjective (subject complement)

When joining two grammatical sentences, use a semicolon or conjunction with a comma or simply plop down an end punctuation (period/exclamation point/question mark) and don't forget to capitalize. This sentence can be fixed by the following among countless other solutions:

Sell your ideas; they are totally acceptable. (semicolon)

Sell your ideas, for they are totally acceptable. (conjunction with comma)

Sell your ideas! They are totally acceptable. (end punctuation)